Medical testing AGAIN!?!?!?!

Wow, I feel like one big health crap sandwich lately. I was not blogging back then, but I had a hysterectomy about 2 1/2 months ago. I had it done for a ton of reasons, and when they got in my belly they found more issues. Fibroids, ovarian cysts, endometriosis, enlarged uterus. The road to surgery was not easy... they did quite a bit of testing, poking, and prodding. The worst was by far having 5 biopsies done during one visit. Well those missed something because when they checked my cervix after taking it out, there were cellular changes, so although it was not cancer, it was developing. Well at least we got that taken care of before it became a real issue.

Now, since surgery I have been having pain issues again in my hands, arms, shoulders, neck, back(this happened before about 2 years ago for a few months, but went away on it's own)... and a couple of times in my legs. The Dr sent me for an x-ray and it showed a narrower space between two of my neck vertebrae, indicating a problem with the discs (?). So next test was MRI which I had done yesterday. It was loud and I was hurting, but I managed to stay still anyway.  Today I go for a nerve test, apparently they have to stick needles in my arms. Let me tell you, the pain, the surgery... this is not the worst part of it all. The worst part is the mental aspect. I have always been mostly healthy, other than hurting myself once in a while thinking that I am superwoman, I really have not had any chronic issues. I am tired of being stuck with needles. I hate them... I felt so incredibly violated when they did the biopsies and stuff, so I am a bit fearful for todays test. However... living like this is not fun.

I went to the music store the other day to look at acoustics... I am thinking of getting one, for a different sound than my strats or hollowbody. I tried a few, they all hurt my hands immediately. Even the one with the lowest action in the place.. there was no way I could have played it. Talk about disappointment. EVERYTHING I love to do, involves the use of my hands... the ONLY thing that does not is singing.

It hurts to make jewelry, to play guitar... although that same night I did play my strat, and something about the weight of the guitar on my shoulder, it must have pulled the pinched nerves and relieved them a bit or something. I won't know the results of these tests till next week when I go see my Dr again.... I am really hoping that it is just a disc issue, or something that can be fixed easily.  I do not really want this test... it involves sticking needles into my muscles.... and that part I HATE!

I am really becoming emotionally spent. I will feel better, start planning things... then out of no where a pain comes and sometimes it literally makes my legs go weak. I want to work, but I never know when I'll be feeling well enough, or when I won't be able to work due to pain. A job outside the house right now seems impossible. Gig's I'd LOVE to be playing out, but if I book a gig and then that day I can't function... how long before no one wants to hire me again? Being good is only part of it, if you are unreliable you won't keep getting work. I'd take a job at a gym again training people, but same problem. At this point... I feel like a prisoner in my own body. And now I am starting to hurt and need to lay down. Hopefully this testing is the beginning of my getting better...

Cyber monday musings

So my birthday is coming up and my boyfriend got me an early birthday present of some enamels. I picked a few colors up, with the needed tools to torch fire enamel. I am not using the kiln for firing yet, however since I do have this tool, that will be used in the future. For now my torch is working well.  So the night I got them I was up till 11pm or so torching in wonder, disappointment, and pride... differing amounts of each. Most of what I made was successful in my eyes anyway.


Here is the very first piece I did...

As you can see, it's not exactly amazing, but not totally ugly. It's actually OK.


Some little beadcaps I enameled with Orient Red. Very cute!

A sweet little pendant... this one has some nice things going on with the layer of golden clear I put on before the colors... makes them seem as if they are floating!

This one was going well, till the tweezers I had it in sweezed it after the metal had annealed.. I tried to hammer it back flat (as you do with metal)... well the glass cracked off in places, so I attempted to cover it up... not totally successfully, but it's still cute.

So I saw someone on youtube doing this type of technique... had to try it! Next time I will be a little more liberal with the white, since it seems to end up looking like less when fired. Learning learning!

Handmade heart toggle, enameled in black and red.... this one actually looks really good!

 

 

These earring are half success half fail... the little enameled headpins, the enamel chipped a bit as they cooled, but I think I have the fix for that.

My first pair of finished enameled earrings... these actually worked out well!

So that is what I made the first 24 hrs or so with my new enamels.... stay tuned to see what I do next!

*Hint- I got some bronze clay pieces drying ;)*

Well well.... things have changed so very much in the last couple of years. It seems I abandoned this blog a long time ago, and now it is time to revive it. My new name as a company as it's own dot com, I have learned a ton more about metal working, about my vision, and what has taken me off track at times.  Soo my vision for this now, is to post on whatever is on my mind, but esp give you a glimpse inside my creative world and mind. Trust me, it's been on overdrive, so there will be no lack of things to blog about.

I will keep it short for now, because as I said my creative mind is on overdrive and I got a design I need to sketch before it fleets it's way right out of my mind.

Till next time... stay creative!!!!